I'm his mother, I would know if he had diarrhea.īeavis: Have you looked in the garbage can? Stewart's Mom: Oh no, you… Butt-head: Beavis, you dumbass, why'd you tell her that? … Stewart doesn't fit in a garbage can, dumbass, remember? If you wanted to put Stewart in a garbage can, you'd have to like, cut him up into little pieces. Stewart's Mom: He does NOT have diarrhea. He's fat.īutt-head: Maybe he has diarrhea. It's, like, against the law or something… " Vidiots" " Stewart Is Missing" Stewart's Mom: It's not like Stewart to miss lunch! Beavis: I bet.
" Babysitting" Butt-head: You're not suppose to touch him, Beavis. See Beavis and Butt-head (specials) for quotes from this Christmas special. Note: This Christmas special contained two parts, "Huh-Huh-Humbug" and "It's a Miserable Life". " Date Watchers" Butt-head: Grab his schlong! " Blood Pressure" Butt-head: I'll trade you for these diapers. Cop: Come on make a spacific offer for sex. Beavis: Wow Butt-head check out the size of that rubber. " Feel a Cop" Butt-head: Hey, baby…so, like, how much? Officer: Fifty. Uhh, my report is, uhh, my report is about the time I kicked Beavis in the nads and he was, like, passed out all day. Van Driessen: Now, Butt-head, please make your report about a figure in American history. Van Driessen: Now, Beavis, what does that have to do with American hist- Beavis: Shut up, I'm not done yet! Mr. Beavis: My report, is on the time, me and Butt-head had like, dinner and stuff.
But that's not going to happen if you don't give your oral report right now. When you finish high school, you'll never have to take another class if you don't want to.
Butt-head: Uhh…never masturbate? Daria: Graduate! It's when you're all done with school. Beavis: Yeah, heheh, I'm going to do an anal report.ĭaria: You guys will never graduate. Folks, these have been some of the best oral reports I have ever heard! Butt-head: Huhuhuh…oral. Clearly, the assassination was a conspiracy. Then it would have had to turn right, then left, and somehow have enough energy to hit the Governor in the front seat. " The Mystery of Morning Wood" " US History" Daria: And when this "magic bullet" went into the President's chest, it had to make a sharp turn in order to exit his body from the neck. Note: See Beavis and Butt-head (specials) for quotes from this Hallowe'en special. 7 "Beavis and Butt-head Do Christmas".
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